Parenting teenagers is not for the faint of heart!

So many of our FHE are turning into discussions based on what is going on in the girls lives. We have had a few of these over the past few weeks. So this week the discussion was on dating. Yes - dating.

Why might you ask?? Based on conversations with my junior high and high school daughters "everyone is dating, and have boyfriends and girlfriends," By everyone I mean their LDS friends. Boys and girls.

I am confused I tell them. Do they not know and understand about the whole 16 thing??? "Mom, nobody follows that,"" their parents don't know" and "welcome to our world" is their response. I then say " so does dating mean they just like someone and talk to them at school if they aren't 16?"

"No Mom, they call, text, meet up, hold hands, kiss etc. etc.."

So the conversation last night started by me asking Todd if I have missed some new information from the church leaders regarding dating seeing how apparently many youth in our ward and at school are doing the above.

As we then talked about dating with the girls it became very evident that what is a date in this day and age is EXTREMELY blurred. I guess it's ok to call, set up a time to meet in the park, talk and do other things.... but technically that's not a date in their minds (and an inappropriate date at that.)

I told Todd that going to the movies and getting an ice cream afterwards would be alot more innocent and better than what some of these kids are doing. The movies and ice cream is a date but hooking up at the park is not...hmmmm, I must be missing something.

Well we were all confused by the end. Kids and parents have different views of what is and what is not a date or what behavior is in the dating category and what behavior is appropriate once you do date.

So I did some researching last night for clarification.

Our next FHE will really be almost like throwing out the word DATE and replacing it with PAIRING OFF and what is appropriate and not appropriate behavior with boys their age.

The prophets and leaders have always been clear on this subject and thank heaven for that. Even though what a date is or is not may have changed in the mind of a teenagers/parents the basic principles still are sound and true.

I guess I didn't realize how unprepared I was to answer these questions about dating as we discussed a variety of situations where we had a hard time labeling if it was a date or not. I thought a date was a pretty black and white kind of thing.

I love my girls very much. Todd and I work hard at being able to talk to them about anything. I am glad that we have a chance to talk about these things with our daughters and that so far they have been receptive to the counsel we give as parents and from leaders who respresent the Lord. I have come to realize that my girls need undiluted information and the opportunities for discussion where they can ask questions.

Next Monday, I will be ready.